Overdue!
Well here we are… November 18th! One day passed due. We know that November 17th really is the right date… this was confirmed via ultrasound… they even said he looked big… back when we had our ultrasound in the summer. So here we are. My family all arrived from California yesterday safe and sound! And a beautiful blanket (close to a foot) of snow to welcome them. It is so great to have them here.
That brings me to the point of writing this post. My family traveled all this way and spent all that money on traveling to come meet Emmaus! BUT Emmaus is still inside me! This causes a lot of stress and anxiety on my part… Oh no! What if he doesn’t come before they leave!!!??? What if they miss him or even only get one day with him??? It has been so frustrating not knowing when little Emmaus is going to come! Its so hard to live life with a huge event coming and not knowing when its going to happen!
BUT there is good news! =) We have God our savior and friend to trust and rely on! Last night I woke up feeling utterly disappointed that I wasn’t in labor and that my families time was ticking away each second I didn’t go into labor. I was really struggling with my fallen humanness of anxiety and disappointment and between the facts that I know about God! Let me explain what I know to be true! Things from the bible that God has told us and things that I can trust and rely on to bring me peace through this time… then I will go on to my struggle between the two…
God LOVES me more than any human being can love. God is all powerful and can do anything anytime. God has my best interest in mind. God is working in me each day to make me more like him and to become the woman he has be to be. God is completely in control. God knows all the details that I don’t know… he sees the entire road map and I only have a low visibly of the road in front of me. I can have peace that passes understanding through trusting in the Lord. Anxiety is pointless and we are told not to be anxious for anything but to pray about everything and to trust in the Lord and thank Him. God will give me the desires of my heart (BUT my desires need to be in the right place… desiring what God has for me… remember he has my best in mind). There were many more things coming to my mind but… now I can’t think of all of them as I type this… (haha that always happens).
So I KNOW that I can rest and have COMPLETE peace in God in this situation and just relax and have fun with my family. Yet… I wake up at night stressed… I am stressed during the day being anxious that things wont go the way we all are hoping. So… I know all these things to be true and I can rest in them… yet I can still feel my self being stressed and worried. How can that be? And how can I have the peace that God promises is available to us? I laid there last night for hours asking God how to reconcile the two. I prayed and asked him to help me take that peace and rest in him and help show me where I am going wrong! I knew I would not fall asleep until I could “figure” it out.
I realized I was afraid of not liking God’s perfect plan for me. I was totally afraid that what if God doesn’t want my family to see Emmaus? Can I take that looking through the things that I know to be true and unchanging of God? Soon as I realized I needed to let go completely of what I wanted and planned for all of this and realized that He would take care of me and everything coming I felt peaceful… still human and needing to keep myself in check… but peaceful and fell asleep!
I hope that made sense to all of you reading this… I am a bit scatter brained being so far along in pregnancy… I can’t usually carry much of a useful conversation. So, if that made any sense to you then its a miracle! Thank you for reading and please pray for us and especially for me that I will be in peace knowing God is in control! Pray I can survive the last few days, I can feel my body getting more and more dilapidated each day.
Thanks!
Debra
On this day..
- Big Changes - Newsletter - 2011
- it was bound to happen - 2006
- MMMMMM!!!! - 2006
- Week Two - 2006
Welcome to the Copeland Ramblings. Explore our site to learn more about us and our ministry with NTM in West Africa
I’ll be praying for you! A similar thing happened to me this summer while waiting for Josie. I ended up have her three days AFTER my Dad had to go back to CA. I was SO sad about that. Fortunately, my Mom was able to extend her trip so she didn’t have to leave until a couple days after her arrival. But we were all sitting around staring at each other almost 2 full weeks even before that… it sucked.
…sorry! I totally understand the stress you are going through – not to mention the discomfort, etc!!
Hang in there Debra… keep trusting in Him even in the dark moments in the night when things seem out of control. Love you.
{{hugs}} Debra! I have so been there. When I was pregnant with my twins my mom came to stay for a month, well THREE weeks went by and they were still not born. It was a hard 3 weeks!
If it’s any consolation your belly really looks lower to me!
Debra, I can totally relate to your questioning of God, even though you know all of his promises. Look at Derrick and I, we had the perfect name chosen for our little boy, and God changed it on us after he was born- with very little explanation. I have learned in the past 2 weeks that His perfect plan is SOO much better than ours, even if we don’t understand everything at the time.
I will pray that your family will get to spend quality time with your new blessing. I will also pray that little Emmaus starts to feel like he’s run out of room and begins descending…and that your labour will be quick!
Enjoy this time with family and try not to stress- your baby can feel all of that, and you don’t want a stressed baby do you??=D When you feel overwhelmed look up 2 corinthians 12:9
BTW: I LOVE your belly photos!!
It’ll all be over soon! Enjoy your last few days of the pregnancy!
We’re thinking about you and hope that Emmaus decides to come soon.
Gwen was 2 days late! Hope everything works out!
Love you guy’s,
Kane’s
Thanks everyone! My midwives say that he is locked and loaded and everything looks pretty much ready… Just a ticking time bomb here! Hopefully soon you will be hearing of a baby… I am having NO contractions that amount to anything nor any painful ones… so hopefully things will kick in to gear… but we shall see what GOD’S plan is. Can’t wait to see what he has planned. Thanks for the encouragement everyone.
Debra, thank you for your honesty. It sure is a battle between our flesh, and resting in Him at times, isn’t it! What a good reminder that He sees, “the WHOLE picture”, and that He is in control.
I’ll be praying that he comes while your family is in town. God knows the situation, so you can lay back and enjoy your family…I’m sure that they came to see YOU, too. ;)
Love,
Jenn